Passed by quite a number of churches which reminded me when was the last time i attended service, it was either too tired, overslept, went back to bed, or some annoying projects that never seem to go away. I was admiring how those British brought their classical- neo classical, victorian ideas over to singapore . Of all places, i think Melbourne has the most Victorian influences in. Well technically because its in the state of Victoria but its so beautifully crafted. the victorian lace, the bustle dress, okay enough Ed.

Hrm.. that leads me to some ideas for me being GOTH for January.. ha. let me just revolve around the victorian goth times.

Yep.. bought them today. but in white.

Dear God,

Please guide me through this, I really need your guidance to guide my heart where i want to belong.

I just need one sign to tell me which direction to go to.

I need You to give me strength to tell them.

I really need You to guide me through this rocky road.

In Jesus name I pray,

Amen.

I going to bring the camera to school on thursday! Not just because i need to document my lesson.. i want to take pictures with the casts.crew of the IOM people. ehhehee.. still suffering from withdrawal symptoms.

i wanna apologise to J.Y. for snapping at her countless times.( sheesh)... for the past week. Yeah.. i'm cranky when i'm stresed. I just afraid that things will go the other way if things are not done and i will be disappointed.

wanna thank Harlie, Shad, JY, Audrey, Wan and Max too.. these people helped me alot throughout the nights =) will never forget how we conspir against SOMEBODY.

hehehe.. wanna thank Shaiful for writing the script and because of that allowing me to fufill my dream of working in the wardrobe dept.. but i did a lousy job... hehehe..

i guess after working in this musical, i think wardrobe is not my kind of thing. i felt jaded... i felt that i have bad designing skills. ( i guess i do la) i have terrible organising and planning skills, i have bad multi-tasking skills, i am a bad working partner ( in terms of chee wai's context), i really have bad stress management skills ( yeah).. well i guess i need to regain my confidence.

after working on this musical, i make me further realise that team work is really important for a project. right now.. i'm having a sense of guilt. Well after some talk with someone, i feel that i'm actually a transparent person, in a sense that i don;t hide my emotions and feelings that well. The person just know me too well.. and for the fact that she knows me too well, its making me feel sad and guilty. Part of me wants this, but part of me refuse to let go because i know that if i let go, i;ll put the team into jeopardy ( can i say that.. jeopardy?) i feel selfish and everything. Oh gosh! i really need to talk to someone about this. Someone spirtual. I need God's words to help me. I need a person from church to guide me tro this crisis. Oh dear Lord.

Heheheheeh!!! So happy!! when i entered school today i was looking out for pple from IOM. and i spotted Farhan and Sazali.. i was like "omg!!! its you guys!" very happy to see them. then went up to class.. yadda yadda went to the lab and print stuff..yadda yadda.. then went down to meet Khamaley! Gosh! missed that guy so much.. I guess this is how you feel after working with them for 8 months. Then during lunch, saw another soldier.. waved at him with all the enthu i have. Just very happy. i think i'll scream if i see the rest. Gosh.. still having bad withdrawal symptons. Real bad ones. =( the very reason why i'm blogging at this un-godly hour is because i slept at 8 30 in front of the television and now i'm going to sleep again.. ciao

Everyone give me a round of applause:

I have stayed in school : Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday and only left school on Saturday 11. 30pm. I've never stayed in school before, yes. i have broken my record..actually the clubhouse is quite comfy to sleep in with the chair's cushions as pillows plus the fact that we are so tired too.

Withdrawal symptons.. Its kinda hard...

eheheh.. yest while packing up , danielle was just looking at the shields that the soldiers used and she started crying and i started crying.. Khamaley didn't wanna look at us ( hehehehe) and in Galieo, we started talking about the show over and over again. I think if i have to blog about friday's event, it will take me the entire day.

Going to miss the casts of Ides of March.

blogging from school.. yes its 3am in the morning and i'm still in the convention centre's dressing room waiting for everyone to get read to sleep... i guess tomorrow will be a hetic day for us, cos its the full dress rehearsals and we are rushing to finsih the final props and costumes... this means alot of MOST of us, hopefully everything goes well for us on friday... thy cross thy fingers... right in front of me, is rashad brushing his teeth. nice view. BAHX.

QUENTIN Tarantino loves Cleopatra Wong.. he made references to Cleopatra Wong in his movies Kill Bill one and two.. the track suit and motorbikes,, kung Fu, ( TODAY online)
I'm kinda honoured to know the lady who played Cleopatra. Well, played badminton a couple of times with her,, as her partner. heehheehheehe. I think we attended her private screening last night. Like most of the audience are her badminton khakis and people who know her. Well.. i gotta say, the movie is kinda cute. No wonder Quentin Tarantino loved it. The way the bad guys died its so Matrix.. kinda funny cos its flimed in the 70s, so what they did maybe does not make any sense to us. Can't believe it.. if Quentin Tarantino ever visits the lead lady. I MUST PAY HER A VIST.

i was thinking whether should i wear all black today.. for national day. instead of the normal red and white. I mean why should i celebrate just because the country that i live in is celebrating her 40th birthday. Shouldn't i be mourning? I mean true enough, this place is secure ( way OVER secured) this place is prosperous ( the fact that the economic is NOT doing well) i feel so suffocated in this place. I mean its a democratic society right? Not some shit hole. This place is boring maybe i should really wear black and mourn for her grand birthday